HALLELUJAH, HALLELUJAH, HALLELUUUUUUUUUUJAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

PRAISE THE LORD, WE HAVE A NEW KING

Today, July 22nd 2013, some time this afternoon, a new king became known to hundreds of people around town. It was a monumental occasion and the news will spread like wildy fire. After a great deal of heaving and shoving, puffing and panting along with a varying degree of sweatiness, I finally had a pooh beyond all poohs and I've taken over as King of the Poohs. What a pile and a bit on the pongy side too which grandad found slightly off-putting as he merrily chomped away on his sandwich.

I also hear that there is a new kid on the block in the popularity stakes. A new pretender to my title. Apparently, the royal lady from down the road hasn't eaten her baby after all (as reported in last week's edition) or if she did, it didn't agree with her and she spewed it up. She had a baby boy and he's going to be King. Now that I find a little strange, where will they get a hat with the glittery bits that will fit him? 

Apart from my historical outlay, today has been one of the funniest for ages. We had to stay in this morning because grandad has a sore eye and had to wait for the parcel man to bring him a new pad for it, which he didn't even wear!! It was a little boring at first so I decided that grandad needed to be on his toes and on his toes he most definitely was. I made several attempts of trying to run through the patio doors and grandad wisely thought it was safer to both man, beast and window that he let me outside to play in the sunnyshine. That was his first mistake!! I ran from one fence to the other fence, the back door to the side door, around the table, up the steps into the house, down the other steps out of the house. There wasn't one grassy blade that I didn't cover and of course, grandad covered the same but slightly easier. Grandad put up the new tenty thing and it promptly fell over again, he carefully positioned it to shade me from the harmful rays of Mr Sunshine but it moved. It was like he was playing chess in the garden but the sun was winning. 

In the afternoon we managed to venture out into the wilderness and we went back into town to buy a crumby old card for nanny as it is nanny and grandad's wedding birthday tomorrow. Grandad isn't very good at buying cards that don't have any sweary words in them or picture of monkey's bums or stupid jokes of penguins called Bert and things. If he has to buy a sensible card, he can't - he's rubbish. We all went into the shop together, grandad looked on the carefully positioned sign outside and it never said no dogs, no doggs or much apart from no smokey sticks, so in we went quite merrily. The young girl behind the counter didn't look too happy, in fact she looked like she'd never looked happy in her life. I tried to hide under my sunshine-keeper-offer but couldn't pull it right over. Millie tried to walk out but grandad had a firm grip on her lead. He was going to embarrass us all with his rubbish choice of card for nanny - how did she manage so long without boshing him on the hooter??

Card selected, we moved on to find the car and return home. Grandad drove us back and I must say he done it without exposing us to any sunshine damage. Where we couldn't take refuge from the town buildings, grandad followed some slightly plump people whose shadows done a good a job as any building could. Clever grandad.

Back home, I continued to give grandad the runaround and did so until nanny and mummy came home. I had a little bit of tea before causing a bit more havoc until mummy took me home. 

Another great day, millions of giggles and plenty of exercise for the old fella..........

DOGG