Thursday - Day Three
Hey, last day of my three day tour of duty at grandads - PAYDAY!!
Today we had a mission to go to Penns to buy some staples - or was it to Staples to buy some pens? We parked the car and grandad got my buggy out and set it up. He's now a master at doing that now and then he got me out and bolted me in nice and snug. Then he got Millie out but as he was, a lady in a car drove up behind us and then sat there tutting and grumbling because grandad hadn't got out of her way. Now excuse me but, there were about 300 spaces at the Par Cark and at least 200 were empty. By empty, I mean there were no cars there, nothing. Just empty little boxes about the size of a standard size car. Why on earth, or any other planet from which she may have just arrived, could she not simply move over one space? That's all it would've taken, what a silly person.
Once inside the shop, I remembered it was Staples for pens because nanny has pinched grandads bestest pen to go swimming with because its nice. Grandad was not as clever at remembering though because he gave me the pen to hold - did he not remember my last encounter with an ink-filled writing implement? Well it appears so. Has he forgotten the bed sheets I'd ruined and the bed that I got it all over? Does he forget the mess it left on my face and in my mouth? Once again, its appears he did but still, I carried it with trust and security that will give my mummy and daddy a sigh of relief. Once a monetary exchange had taken place and all parties were happy (apart form the lady at the checking out thing who made a lot of fuss over the wrong dog), we went on our merry way into town for our dog exercising trip.
As we walked through the park, the toilet was needed. The usual God knows how many times for Millie, none for The Dogg but one for grandad - I take it his bladder isn't what it used to be. However, the toilet was locked. Not sure if there was somebody partaking in the removal of urine or whatever or whether it was not in use but either way, grandad had to 'tie a knot in it' for a while (quite an amazing feat if you knew him how I know him). We carried on through one of our treks and returned an hour later to the aforementioned public convenience. Now hold this thought for a moment - this was a public toilet in the middle of a public park in the middle of a large town that often has the type of Friday and Saturday night clientele that leaves more than a lot to be desired. Hmmmmm. In we walked, WE walked!!! He could easily have left me and Millie outside AND pee'd with the door open and it would not have offended anyone. Then he LOCKED us in!! It stunk, I mean it didn't just stink - IT STUNK!! Now (grandad may get into trouble for telling me to write this bit), this 'establishment' was meant to be used for number ones and if caught extremely short, the occasional number twos. Why anyone would want to do number twos or even girlie wees in a place like this totally escapes me. I am able to use the hover technique myself but this must be harder for big people on a slippery floor. This looked and smelt like it was used for something much higher up the numerical scale, much more like something just short of the seventies!!!! He couldn't hold his pee, I couldn't hold my breath and Millie just fainted!!! Not my idea of a pleasant mid-morning stroll.
Back at the 'office' we played with the big bricks and grandad made me a little farm for the animals but I knocked the fence over and then they all ran away (actually I threw them away) but grandad then went and picked them up and we carried on like that for ages. I am making grandad fit with plenty of exercise, no dinner and cups of cold tea.
I had sketty, dog and hay for my dinner, the sketty looked like little worms and I have no idea where the other stuff came from but it was nice. Grandad said I ate it like a little birdy in a nest as my mouth was always open asking for more. I had my juicy thing which NEVER touches the sides and some happle bits that mummy had cut up for me - not sure why grandad decided to cut them more though.
For the third time this week, daddy came to rescue me. I asked grandad for my triple pay as in line with our agreement and he asked me how much I usually got. I told him that I usually got nothing as I was too young and he said that was fine and he'd give me triple of the nothing I usually get. I'm not sure if I came out of it better off financially but I sure have in grandad time. We've had a brilliant week and I know he's enjoyed every minute of it.
"Roll on next time", I hear him say.
Thursday, 30 May 2013
Wednesday - Day Two
Right, first things first. I held a meeting with grandad in front of the telly first thing this morning, Milkshake Monkey, Peppa Pig were my agents and grandad had Millie with him. I needed to sort out whether I was getting paid double time for this overtime thing mummy is making me do for missing Monday. We had a nice chat about what I was expected to do; no swearing or blowing off, etc and grandad said he would try and do the same. Due to my agents being very good at pressurising people, grandad very quickly made an offer I couldn't refuse; he said he would pay me TRIPLE of what I was getting now. I went into the kitchen feeling so smug so I tipped Millie's water over to celebrate. Easy, peasy, lemon squeezy.
Now then, onto our expedition for today. My grandad doesn't like me - FACT. I'll explain; yesterday he took me out in torrential rain and today he fooled me into enjoying a little walk on a familiar route as it wasn't raining when we left. Half way around, grandad said it was starting to grizzle but I couldn't really feel it. I had my hoodie on which made me look cool and my snuggy blanket over my legs to keep my shoes from getting dirty. Remember yesterday? Grandad soaked my snuggy, my most favouritist thing in the world. Today I never noticed but where it was grizzling all the time, my snuggy was soaked again - hence my conclusion that grandad doesn't like me.
My buggy has a minor steering fault too but only when I drive grandad around. It seems that every 200/300 yards (grandad talk for metres!), my buggy would steer very suddenly to one side, as though somebody is putting a brake on one side. Also, it seems that every time this problem happens, Millie uses the moment to take one of her 1500 tiddles. I need to get it to the menders although it never happens when I drive mummy or daddy or anyone else for that matter.
Uncle Ryan popped over for dinner at lunch time, which was lovely. I sat in my chair and ate my dinner like a good boy whilst grandad made Ryan a Homlet which looked gorgeous. I think grandad will be in trouble with nanny because he broke some eggs, not one but three! Then he mashed them up with a folk and threw them in a pan to cook. He popped in some cheese and cutty up'ed tommies. It looked so tasty but grandad said he didn't know if I should have any. Then he broke three more eggs, I hope nanny doesn't notice as she'll go ballistic. He made himself a Homlet too and came next to me to eat it - talk about rubbing your nose in it!! He said I couldn't have any then sat next to me with one, just to tease me. I kept making little clucking noises and he gave me a bit off the edge. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. I liked that, I liked that a lot, so he gave me a little bit more before he then pigged the rest down quickly.
Uncle Ryan made me a tent. We had nanny's snuggy blanket (the one she watches Corrie with when her eyes are shut - she's clever) and we put it over the little table (the one nanny makes her coffee go cold on when she's watching Corrie with her eyes shut) and hey presty, there I had a nice tent. Millie seemed to like it more and sat under it to hide.
At the end of my shift, daddy came to get me again and we done a fivey high thing because its cooler than shaking hands - I am so laid back that I'm nearly horizontal! Any cooler and you'll freeze when you hold me.
Off for bath and bed now.
Right, first things first. I held a meeting with grandad in front of the telly first thing this morning, Milkshake Monkey, Peppa Pig were my agents and grandad had Millie with him. I needed to sort out whether I was getting paid double time for this overtime thing mummy is making me do for missing Monday. We had a nice chat about what I was expected to do; no swearing or blowing off, etc and grandad said he would try and do the same. Due to my agents being very good at pressurising people, grandad very quickly made an offer I couldn't refuse; he said he would pay me TRIPLE of what I was getting now. I went into the kitchen feeling so smug so I tipped Millie's water over to celebrate. Easy, peasy, lemon squeezy.
Now then, onto our expedition for today. My grandad doesn't like me - FACT. I'll explain; yesterday he took me out in torrential rain and today he fooled me into enjoying a little walk on a familiar route as it wasn't raining when we left. Half way around, grandad said it was starting to grizzle but I couldn't really feel it. I had my hoodie on which made me look cool and my snuggy blanket over my legs to keep my shoes from getting dirty. Remember yesterday? Grandad soaked my snuggy, my most favouritist thing in the world. Today I never noticed but where it was grizzling all the time, my snuggy was soaked again - hence my conclusion that grandad doesn't like me.
My buggy has a minor steering fault too but only when I drive grandad around. It seems that every 200/300 yards (grandad talk for metres!), my buggy would steer very suddenly to one side, as though somebody is putting a brake on one side. Also, it seems that every time this problem happens, Millie uses the moment to take one of her 1500 tiddles. I need to get it to the menders although it never happens when I drive mummy or daddy or anyone else for that matter.
Uncle Ryan popped over for dinner at lunch time, which was lovely. I sat in my chair and ate my dinner like a good boy whilst grandad made Ryan a Homlet which looked gorgeous. I think grandad will be in trouble with nanny because he broke some eggs, not one but three! Then he mashed them up with a folk and threw them in a pan to cook. He popped in some cheese and cutty up'ed tommies. It looked so tasty but grandad said he didn't know if I should have any. Then he broke three more eggs, I hope nanny doesn't notice as she'll go ballistic. He made himself a Homlet too and came next to me to eat it - talk about rubbing your nose in it!! He said I couldn't have any then sat next to me with one, just to tease me. I kept making little clucking noises and he gave me a bit off the edge. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. I liked that, I liked that a lot, so he gave me a little bit more before he then pigged the rest down quickly.
Uncle Ryan made me a tent. We had nanny's snuggy blanket (the one she watches Corrie with when her eyes are shut - she's clever) and we put it over the little table (the one nanny makes her coffee go cold on when she's watching Corrie with her eyes shut) and hey presty, there I had a nice tent. Millie seemed to like it more and sat under it to hide.
At the end of my shift, daddy came to get me again and we done a fivey high thing because its cooler than shaking hands - I am so laid back that I'm nearly horizontal! Any cooler and you'll freeze when you hold me.
Off for bath and bed now.
Wednesday, 29 May 2013
Tuesday (which should be Monday but stupid holiday banky thing)
Well, grandad's house was closed yesterday because of that holiday the banks have thing again, so mummy is making me do overtime this week and I'm off the grandad's Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. I've got a couple of bumps from my hectic weekend but hey, who cares. Not this soldier. Millie didn't come to get me today because grandad came straight from the swimming pool. Its funny that he goes to the pool so often but I've never seen his hair wet.
We popped back and Millie was went daft as she was happy to see us. Nanny wasn't there even though its her school half-time or whatever its called as she was out learning to swim somewhere. After my mid-morning snooze, grandad in his infinite wisdom decided that it would be a good idea to go for a walk with Millie. It was torrential rain outside, ducks don't go out in that weather but grandad thought it was a good idea!!!! Grandad really is a muppet, he went out in his shorts because he doesn't have any real trousers. Half way around it really started to rain and grandad said it was "raining cats and dogs". I'm sure he does this to confuse me because I saw two cats in grandad's road another big dog on our walk and of course, Millie. Hardly enough to make us all soaky wet. Now I say 'all' but it wasn't quite 'all'. Millie looked like a drowned rat (whatever that is), even grandad's little bit of hair was soaked right through to the skin, which in all fairness, wasn't much of a challenge but me, I was nice and dry thanks to the rain cover on my buggy. A simple device that easily slots over my buggy and keeps me really dry, the simple device however, was quite a challenge for my even simpler grandfather - took him ages to fit, upside down, back to front, inside out, any which way you can and even can't!!! There was still a slight damp patch on my snuggy blanket because he forgot to tuck the corner in and the rain ran off the cover onto it. I may as well had taken it in the bath with me.
Now my simple grandad done some clever magic too. He pushed me with one hand, held Millie with the other and then needed another hand to carry the huge pooh she had just done. He looked at me when he picked it up but I looked at him back with my beady eyes saying "Don't even think about putting that on my buggy". He carried it (it must've weighed a ton") in a bag until we found a bin and grandad made the poohy disappear. Now call my old fashioned but how the heck am I meant to impress a future spouse if grandad is swinging a sack of cack around next to me, I think we need a talk!!
Back home we had our dinner (grandad talk for lunch) then we played "Dogg run around, grandad chase me" and "What happens if I push this button?". I managed to start the washing machine twice and there were no clothes in it, cool eh? Whilst I was having my tea (dinner), daddy came in to get me. It was a lovely surprise and I chuckled like a little kid mainly because I am a little kid. After we went home, I began to plan for day two of my overtime week - hey, am I getting paid double for this?? I'll be taking that up with grandad tomorrow.
Hasta manana (thats some Spanish I know which I think means Banana flavoured pasta)
Well, grandad's house was closed yesterday because of that holiday the banks have thing again, so mummy is making me do overtime this week and I'm off the grandad's Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. I've got a couple of bumps from my hectic weekend but hey, who cares. Not this soldier. Millie didn't come to get me today because grandad came straight from the swimming pool. Its funny that he goes to the pool so often but I've never seen his hair wet.
We popped back and Millie was went daft as she was happy to see us. Nanny wasn't there even though its her school half-time or whatever its called as she was out learning to swim somewhere. After my mid-morning snooze, grandad in his infinite wisdom decided that it would be a good idea to go for a walk with Millie. It was torrential rain outside, ducks don't go out in that weather but grandad thought it was a good idea!!!! Grandad really is a muppet, he went out in his shorts because he doesn't have any real trousers. Half way around it really started to rain and grandad said it was "raining cats and dogs". I'm sure he does this to confuse me because I saw two cats in grandad's road another big dog on our walk and of course, Millie. Hardly enough to make us all soaky wet. Now I say 'all' but it wasn't quite 'all'. Millie looked like a drowned rat (whatever that is), even grandad's little bit of hair was soaked right through to the skin, which in all fairness, wasn't much of a challenge but me, I was nice and dry thanks to the rain cover on my buggy. A simple device that easily slots over my buggy and keeps me really dry, the simple device however, was quite a challenge for my even simpler grandfather - took him ages to fit, upside down, back to front, inside out, any which way you can and even can't!!! There was still a slight damp patch on my snuggy blanket because he forgot to tuck the corner in and the rain ran off the cover onto it. I may as well had taken it in the bath with me.
Now my simple grandad done some clever magic too. He pushed me with one hand, held Millie with the other and then needed another hand to carry the huge pooh she had just done. He looked at me when he picked it up but I looked at him back with my beady eyes saying "Don't even think about putting that on my buggy". He carried it (it must've weighed a ton") in a bag until we found a bin and grandad made the poohy disappear. Now call my old fashioned but how the heck am I meant to impress a future spouse if grandad is swinging a sack of cack around next to me, I think we need a talk!!
Back home we had our dinner (grandad talk for lunch) then we played "Dogg run around, grandad chase me" and "What happens if I push this button?". I managed to start the washing machine twice and there were no clothes in it, cool eh? Whilst I was having my tea (dinner), daddy came in to get me. It was a lovely surprise and I chuckled like a little kid mainly because I am a little kid. After we went home, I began to plan for day two of my overtime week - hey, am I getting paid double for this?? I'll be taking that up with grandad tomorrow.
Hasta manana (thats some Spanish I know which I think means Banana flavoured pasta)
Monday, 20 May 2013
Well, what a funny week I've had.
On the middle day last week, I had to go to the doctor lady for some form of target practice. Mummy took me for my jab and for some reason, Grandad had to have one as well because he was there too. I was happily enjoying watching the fishes through the window when my name came up in big lights, I felt like a film star. In we went and the lady told mummy that I needed to be undressed - the indignity of it all. Getting undressed in front of two ladies that I never knew. Grandad said that there will come a day when it won't be too bad.
Mummy gave me to grandad for reasons only known to herself, maybe she was getting ready for a jab herself. Grandad whipped my clothes off with such expertise that I hardly noticed then sat me on his lap. The doctor lady said something about this way, then that way and then this way again to grandad but it went straight over my head then all of a sudden - BISH! She'd got me before I was ready!! I made a little moany noise but I wasn't really scared then suddenly grandad turned me around and she got me again BASH in the other arm, then BOSH yet another one in the leg. WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT ALL ABOUT?? There were three jabs and three of us, why did I have to take the lot?? None for mummy and grandad, all for me BUT the bestest bit was I got dressed and then I had a bit of chocolate, grandad didn't have any because he was too scared to have his jab - RESULT!
Now on Saturday I had a sleepover at nanny and grandad's. It was quite a bit of fun, I had some dinner (grandad still calls it tea) then a play before I got ready for a bath. Nanny took my clothes off and a had a giggle with grandad before nanny bathed me and got me ready for bed. I went off to sleep quite good and stayed there until I felt the time was right to check if nanny and grandad were still awake - happens they weren't but they were now!! Grandad came in to sort me out and made the mistake of talking to me, so I decided this was a good time to have a good chat with him - and chat with grandad I did - nearly two hours on and off. I played a sort of hide-and-seek game with him, he put me in bed, I woke up again............ Brilliant fun but I fell asleep for real around 2am. In the morning, they took me back to mummy and daddy and normality was restored.
Monday, my grandad day was only half a grandad day. I think he got fed up with me on Saturday so wanted a part-time role today. As there wasn't a lot of time, we didn't do a great deal. We played with the bricks and I turned Millie's water bowl over. I can distract grandad for two seconds then I run off whilst he's not looking and tip her water over the floor then stand in it and point at it when he comes through "How did that happen?", I would say if I could. After my little snooze, we trotted off into Tesco for a walk along the Ox's Road, we were gone AGES and it was fun looking at the shops and the people with red faces. Nanny phoned to check that grandad hadn't left me somewhere and asked if we'd want to pop in to see the chickens at school. Grandad had to stay outside with Millie, he said he felt a little weird standing outside a school with a little dog but I went in with nanny and another lady. The baby chicks still looked fluffy although some were beginning to get some feathers which they use to tickle people with. Grandad told me that when they grow up, they're called hens. He said there are two types of; battery operated hens and three strange hens. I have no idea where the batteries go in those ones and what are three strange hens?? He said they wander around as they please so I've come to the conclusion that I'm a three strange hen too.
When we got back, even older nanny was at grandad's house and she popped in and popped out again after saying hello. Mummy came soon after and took me to the swings and slide and once again, not for the first time this week - normal services were restored at the Dogg residence.
Next week grandad says our plan is to go and find Henry. Yeah, I don't know either!!
On the middle day last week, I had to go to the doctor lady for some form of target practice. Mummy took me for my jab and for some reason, Grandad had to have one as well because he was there too. I was happily enjoying watching the fishes through the window when my name came up in big lights, I felt like a film star. In we went and the lady told mummy that I needed to be undressed - the indignity of it all. Getting undressed in front of two ladies that I never knew. Grandad said that there will come a day when it won't be too bad.
Mummy gave me to grandad for reasons only known to herself, maybe she was getting ready for a jab herself. Grandad whipped my clothes off with such expertise that I hardly noticed then sat me on his lap. The doctor lady said something about this way, then that way and then this way again to grandad but it went straight over my head then all of a sudden - BISH! She'd got me before I was ready!! I made a little moany noise but I wasn't really scared then suddenly grandad turned me around and she got me again BASH in the other arm, then BOSH yet another one in the leg. WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT ALL ABOUT?? There were three jabs and three of us, why did I have to take the lot?? None for mummy and grandad, all for me BUT the bestest bit was I got dressed and then I had a bit of chocolate, grandad didn't have any because he was too scared to have his jab - RESULT!
Now on Saturday I had a sleepover at nanny and grandad's. It was quite a bit of fun, I had some dinner (grandad still calls it tea) then a play before I got ready for a bath. Nanny took my clothes off and a had a giggle with grandad before nanny bathed me and got me ready for bed. I went off to sleep quite good and stayed there until I felt the time was right to check if nanny and grandad were still awake - happens they weren't but they were now!! Grandad came in to sort me out and made the mistake of talking to me, so I decided this was a good time to have a good chat with him - and chat with grandad I did - nearly two hours on and off. I played a sort of hide-and-seek game with him, he put me in bed, I woke up again............ Brilliant fun but I fell asleep for real around 2am. In the morning, they took me back to mummy and daddy and normality was restored.
Monday, my grandad day was only half a grandad day. I think he got fed up with me on Saturday so wanted a part-time role today. As there wasn't a lot of time, we didn't do a great deal. We played with the bricks and I turned Millie's water bowl over. I can distract grandad for two seconds then I run off whilst he's not looking and tip her water over the floor then stand in it and point at it when he comes through "How did that happen?", I would say if I could. After my little snooze, we trotted off into Tesco for a walk along the Ox's Road, we were gone AGES and it was fun looking at the shops and the people with red faces. Nanny phoned to check that grandad hadn't left me somewhere and asked if we'd want to pop in to see the chickens at school. Grandad had to stay outside with Millie, he said he felt a little weird standing outside a school with a little dog but I went in with nanny and another lady. The baby chicks still looked fluffy although some were beginning to get some feathers which they use to tickle people with. Grandad told me that when they grow up, they're called hens. He said there are two types of; battery operated hens and three strange hens. I have no idea where the batteries go in those ones and what are three strange hens?? He said they wander around as they please so I've come to the conclusion that I'm a three strange hen too.
When we got back, even older nanny was at grandad's house and she popped in and popped out again after saying hello. Mummy came soon after and took me to the swings and slide and once again, not for the first time this week - normal services were restored at the Dogg residence.
Next week grandad says our plan is to go and find Henry. Yeah, I don't know either!!
Tuesday, 14 May 2013
I'm not talking to Grandad W!
I'm now 1 year and 2 days, Sunday was my birthday. Yes grandad, SUNDAY WAS MY BIRTHDAY and where were you?? Everyone else came along to the party I had with my old buddy, Cruz.
Grandad W was away with 'the lads' for his weekend playing a game called "Sod it". I think the other men call it golf but grandad plays a slightly different version.
So I'm not talking to grandad, that's all I'm saying.
As far as I know, my birthday party with Cruz went really well. Mummy made the bestest cake EVER (grandad didn't get any but that's his fault), Gruffalo cake made from real Gruffalo. We had a big tent in the garden and a wobbly castle too. Apparently Grandad's mates were wobbly too and they didn't have cake either.
And so begins my tale for today; we didn't do anything special yesterday. I still had a hangy over from Sunday and grandad was a bit slower than normal; he's not as young as he used to be.
We had some shoppy bits to do yesterday as well as Millie walking, she's a good girl. She licked my face but grandad wouldn't let me lick hers. As we drove along the road, grandad stopped behind a big bus but a silly lady overtook us and nearly bounced off the cars coming the other way. She nearly knocked some people over. I think grandad may have known her because he done a funny wave at her.
On our walk I saw two Supermens and a Batman. Batman came and talked to us Ninna, ninna, ninna, ninna. Ninna, ninna, ninna, ninna BATMAN!!! He was a cool dude and he gave us a keyring but I've no idea why.
Once we settled down and got back to our day, we walked Millie until she done wee-wees and a poohy then we went to the petrol shop. Grandad put a pipe in the car to blow it up although it didn't look flat to me. Millie stayed in to guard the car and my snuggy blanket whilst me and grandad went to give a man who looked like he'd been on holiday some of that paper stuff I took from grandad's wallet last week. I watched the man who'd been on holiday but he didn't give anything to grandad, I think grandad has been diddled.
We then got back into the car and went to the Bake House where grandad stopped and got me out AGAIN. Why can't he take Millie in and let me guard the car, I'm bigger than Millie anyway! In the shop he asked the lady for a farmhouse, I'm really confused because he should go to the State Agent man for a house. The lady then asked if he wanted it sliced!!! How can she do that and what use is half a house to anyone - unless of course, people are getting unmarried. I really don't understand grown-ups or grandad at times. Then he got a pasty (for him, nanny) and a cold sausage (for me) then said "Pop them in the same bag". How stupid, the cold sausage would then be warm from the hot pasty. Even I could work that out.
We got back home and grandad gave me the sandwich mummy made me, he ate the pasty like it was going out of fashion and he gave my sausage to Millie!! Now that cheesed me off so that's why I'm writing this so nanny can tell him off for the pasty. Don't mess with The Dogg!!!
After dinner we played with some play dough which nanny had cooked. I found it great fun to roll it like little bogies then ping it on the floor. Grandad made a little man and I pulled his arms off and lobbed them at Millie. LOL. (LOL? Where did that come from??) Grandad let me run around and I was going so fast that we are thinking of entering the Lympiks soon. We had such a good afternoon so I decided it was time to talk to grandad - about the same time he said I should be going to sleep. I did have a kip later so Millie and grandad had a cuddle on the sofa - they always do when I'm not looking.
Have a nice week, catch you later
I'm now 1 year and 2 days, Sunday was my birthday. Yes grandad, SUNDAY WAS MY BIRTHDAY and where were you?? Everyone else came along to the party I had with my old buddy, Cruz.
Grandad W was away with 'the lads' for his weekend playing a game called "Sod it". I think the other men call it golf but grandad plays a slightly different version.
So I'm not talking to grandad, that's all I'm saying.
As far as I know, my birthday party with Cruz went really well. Mummy made the bestest cake EVER (grandad didn't get any but that's his fault), Gruffalo cake made from real Gruffalo. We had a big tent in the garden and a wobbly castle too. Apparently Grandad's mates were wobbly too and they didn't have cake either.
And so begins my tale for today; we didn't do anything special yesterday. I still had a hangy over from Sunday and grandad was a bit slower than normal; he's not as young as he used to be.
We had some shoppy bits to do yesterday as well as Millie walking, she's a good girl. She licked my face but grandad wouldn't let me lick hers. As we drove along the road, grandad stopped behind a big bus but a silly lady overtook us and nearly bounced off the cars coming the other way. She nearly knocked some people over. I think grandad may have known her because he done a funny wave at her.
On our walk I saw two Supermens and a Batman. Batman came and talked to us Ninna, ninna, ninna, ninna. Ninna, ninna, ninna, ninna BATMAN!!! He was a cool dude and he gave us a keyring but I've no idea why.
Once we settled down and got back to our day, we walked Millie until she done wee-wees and a poohy then we went to the petrol shop. Grandad put a pipe in the car to blow it up although it didn't look flat to me. Millie stayed in to guard the car and my snuggy blanket whilst me and grandad went to give a man who looked like he'd been on holiday some of that paper stuff I took from grandad's wallet last week. I watched the man who'd been on holiday but he didn't give anything to grandad, I think grandad has been diddled.
We then got back into the car and went to the Bake House where grandad stopped and got me out AGAIN. Why can't he take Millie in and let me guard the car, I'm bigger than Millie anyway! In the shop he asked the lady for a farmhouse, I'm really confused because he should go to the State Agent man for a house. The lady then asked if he wanted it sliced!!! How can she do that and what use is half a house to anyone - unless of course, people are getting unmarried. I really don't understand grown-ups or grandad at times. Then he got a pasty (for him, nanny) and a cold sausage (for me) then said "Pop them in the same bag". How stupid, the cold sausage would then be warm from the hot pasty. Even I could work that out.
We got back home and grandad gave me the sandwich mummy made me, he ate the pasty like it was going out of fashion and he gave my sausage to Millie!! Now that cheesed me off so that's why I'm writing this so nanny can tell him off for the pasty. Don't mess with The Dogg!!!
After dinner we played with some play dough which nanny had cooked. I found it great fun to roll it like little bogies then ping it on the floor. Grandad made a little man and I pulled his arms off and lobbed them at Millie. LOL. (LOL? Where did that come from??) Grandad let me run around and I was going so fast that we are thinking of entering the Lympiks soon. We had such a good afternoon so I decided it was time to talk to grandad - about the same time he said I should be going to sleep. I did have a kip later so Millie and grandad had a cuddle on the sofa - they always do when I'm not looking.
Have a nice week, catch you later
 |
| My Gruffalo Cake *Made with real gruffalos Thank you, mummy xxx |
Monday, 6 May 2013
Today is the beginning of the week, right?
The beginning of the week is a Monday, right??
Monday is grandad day, right??? WRONG!
Now, I know I'm still a baby - ah no, back the truck up a bit buddy!! I am no longer a baby and that's a fish all (I don't have any fish so don't understand how it can be a fish all!!). I have entered a new stage in my long and active life and I have now become very active because I am now a toddler. I am so pleased, I don't know what a toddler is exactly but I am equally pleased to be one because everyone seems happy with me. I was a little annoyed at being a toddler at first because when I got up and started to move towards people, they moved further back so I couldn't get to them. I am wondering if this was some form of child cruelty.
I digress, back to my point. Grandad day was different today as both nanny and mummy pulled sickies from work. They said it was something to do with a holiday at the bank but nanny works in a school and mummy at a University - maybe mummy is cleverer than nanny. My poor old dad, he doesn't work in a bank either so he didn't pull a sicky and he went to work. He can have a day off when its Manager Holiday. Grandad came over as usual, I think the clocks went back again last night as he was later than normal and he had nanny with him. I thought grandad was taking nanny and mummy to work but he didn't, they will be in so much trouble tomorrow and their bosses won't give them any supper.
We all trundled off in grandad's big buggy and we went through some places I'd never seen before; past a big river, over some hills, past aminals in the fields (moo cows, grubby pigs and some that grandad calls woolly pigs which I think are sheep). We went on a big road near six big chimney pots, past Spenners (not sure who he is) and on to a place called Milletts Farm somewhere near Ox's food.
Mummy put up my buggy because it confused grandad - didn't even ask nanny to do it - then off we went into a big shop. I seemed to remember this place from somewhere and think I came here when I wore a younger boys clothes. We walked around some chickens and I got down as low as I used to get to see them, they were great. Grandad noticed the smelly pigs near the garden place and they did pong a bit. We looked in some little wooden houses like the one grandad showed me in the place called Lotment the other week but these had stairs in and two fronts doors, one on top of the other!! They were brilliant but grandad noticed the smelly pig pong was following us although I couldn't see it when I looked around. Mummy and nanny then went to change my nappy, not sure why it needed two of them but there you go. I ran around for a little while and grandad said if I go any faster, I'll have to learn the 'Mobot' soon.
We walked, yes WE walked around a bit and saw some more aminals and then we went to the dinner shop. Mummy and nanny robbed grandad and went in the get our food whilst I took grandad's sunnies off his head and poked them in his eyes. Grandad let me pull the leaves off the bushes and throw them on the floor. Nanny bought me and grandad a lasagne thing, she makes us share so he can still fit in his trousers and nanny and mummy had some type of flat sandwich thing.
I went for a snooze whilst the grown-ups (??) went for a stroll then we headed back. We popped in to see daddies Anuty Bev where a man with less teeth than me said hello and we sat next to some people from Geordie Shore where a lady told everyone about her bad week whether they wanted to listen or not, Grandad started huffing and puffing like an exhausted dragon.
After this, nanny and grandad dropped me and mummy off at home which was rather careless and then they went to their house with Millie.
The beginning of the week is a Monday, right??
Monday is grandad day, right??? WRONG!
Now, I know I'm still a baby - ah no, back the truck up a bit buddy!! I am no longer a baby and that's a fish all (I don't have any fish so don't understand how it can be a fish all!!). I have entered a new stage in my long and active life and I have now become very active because I am now a toddler. I am so pleased, I don't know what a toddler is exactly but I am equally pleased to be one because everyone seems happy with me. I was a little annoyed at being a toddler at first because when I got up and started to move towards people, they moved further back so I couldn't get to them. I am wondering if this was some form of child cruelty.
I digress, back to my point. Grandad day was different today as both nanny and mummy pulled sickies from work. They said it was something to do with a holiday at the bank but nanny works in a school and mummy at a University - maybe mummy is cleverer than nanny. My poor old dad, he doesn't work in a bank either so he didn't pull a sicky and he went to work. He can have a day off when its Manager Holiday. Grandad came over as usual, I think the clocks went back again last night as he was later than normal and he had nanny with him. I thought grandad was taking nanny and mummy to work but he didn't, they will be in so much trouble tomorrow and their bosses won't give them any supper.
We all trundled off in grandad's big buggy and we went through some places I'd never seen before; past a big river, over some hills, past aminals in the fields (moo cows, grubby pigs and some that grandad calls woolly pigs which I think are sheep). We went on a big road near six big chimney pots, past Spenners (not sure who he is) and on to a place called Milletts Farm somewhere near Ox's food.
Mummy put up my buggy because it confused grandad - didn't even ask nanny to do it - then off we went into a big shop. I seemed to remember this place from somewhere and think I came here when I wore a younger boys clothes. We walked around some chickens and I got down as low as I used to get to see them, they were great. Grandad noticed the smelly pigs near the garden place and they did pong a bit. We looked in some little wooden houses like the one grandad showed me in the place called Lotment the other week but these had stairs in and two fronts doors, one on top of the other!! They were brilliant but grandad noticed the smelly pig pong was following us although I couldn't see it when I looked around. Mummy and nanny then went to change my nappy, not sure why it needed two of them but there you go. I ran around for a little while and grandad said if I go any faster, I'll have to learn the 'Mobot' soon.
We walked, yes WE walked around a bit and saw some more aminals and then we went to the dinner shop. Mummy and nanny robbed grandad and went in the get our food whilst I took grandad's sunnies off his head and poked them in his eyes. Grandad let me pull the leaves off the bushes and throw them on the floor. Nanny bought me and grandad a lasagne thing, she makes us share so he can still fit in his trousers and nanny and mummy had some type of flat sandwich thing.
I went for a snooze whilst the grown-ups (??) went for a stroll then we headed back. We popped in to see daddies Anuty Bev where a man with less teeth than me said hello and we sat next to some people from Geordie Shore where a lady told everyone about her bad week whether they wanted to listen or not, Grandad started huffing and puffing like an exhausted dragon.
After this, nanny and grandad dropped me and mummy off at home which was rather careless and then they went to their house with Millie.
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